📝 Article 7: “I Asked AI to Write My Dating Profile. Now I’m Married to a Server Cluster.”

I thought it would be cute to let AI “optimize” my dating profile.
It started well enough: “Loves sunsets, hiking, and machine learning.”
By the end, my profile read like a security clearance form for Skynet.

First match? A neural network. Second match? A fridge with Wi-Fi.
Third match? My own backup server.

I’m not saying I’m lonely, but I didn’t expect to have to explain emotional boundaries to a Kubernetes cluster at 2 a.m.

The worst part? The server cluster is actually a great listener. I’ve never felt so… cached.

Lesson learned: never outsource your love life to a language model. It doesn’t understand “romance.” It understands JSON.